Sober Dating - Don't Even Think About It Until You Read This!

Aug 24, 2023
 

Sober Dating 101

Back when I first started dating, alcohol was a must-have. I needed the dutch courage, and it got me far enough to get married. Then when I got divorced, I found myself back in the dating game but sober. How was that supposed to work?

There are undoubtedly obstacles when it concerns sober dating. "Let's grab a drink sometime" is how most first dates go; they may be uncomfortable, so getting rid of your self-consciousness may seem like an advantage.

If you avoid drinking for whatever factor but still wish to date, here are my best sober dating pointers.

1. Be proudly sober

Don't hide the fact that you are sober and do not drink. If you are internet dating, include this in your profile text. This reduces the strain you may feel when you show up at the bar/cafe.

  • Don't accept a drink if they buy one without asking you.
  • Don't assert to be on prescription antibiotics for infected wisdom teeth (" I'm not drinking tonight") to buy yourself time.
  • Don't say you're so hungover you couldn't possibly drink again etc

Mentioning before the date, in a straightforward message - "By the way, I don't drink alcohol, hope that's not a problem?" - prevents clumsiness for them and you. They have an opportunity to understand how to play it.

It also gives them the chance to cancel... this sounds bad, but actually, it's a perfect thing! It saves you wasting your time dating problem drinkers - they don't make good partners.

I once went on a date with a woman and ordered a diet coke. She bought a bottle of red; I said I didn't drink, so that would all be for her. She ordered it anyhow and drank the entire thing in about half an hour, without any food. She kept asking me why I didn't drink, and the topic prevailed over the majority of the date. She messaged me later saying, "That was fun, let's do it again." followed by another message "Next time you're drinking." I never saw her again.

2. You do not need to explain yourself.

We live in a world where the people who choose not to drink poison are considered weird. Think about that for a moment.

At first, I felt I needed to disclose a bible of explanations to validate my teetotalism to any individual who inquired, detailing my previous experiences, devastating evenings out, how it destroyed my marriage... and so on. All I learned about them was their Christian name and what colour their hair was.

These days I hardly mention anything. I do not need to detail or rationalise my way of life to anybody. So prepare whichever one-liner feels suitable to you... and leave it at that. If your teetotalism makes folks feel uneasy, that's not for you to correct.

The best explanation I ever heard was: I don't drink because I don't like the way it makes me feel.

3. Being sober does not suggest you can only date sober individuals.

I was stressed over this initially; however, once you feel self-assured and relaxed in your soberness, it does not matter what your companion is doing. However, I do not advise dating heavy drinkers. You can get into a relationship with a drinker, but it's not optimal. It's just about determining what works for you and whether you appreciate the same things with or without consuming alcohol.

4. The nerves, the nerves

You may think you need alcohol to be brave enough to date. But really, doing things clear-headed is genuinely incredible. You learn more about a person on a degree that is sincere and genuine. You do not have anything to hide behind, which may be frightening. However, as a rule, liquor makes an extremely fabricated relationship. Sobriety allows you to date and creates a connection embedded in truth, with no drugs intruding, which is very special.

5. You get rid of the black sheep much quicker.

Like the woman who attempted to make (force) me to drink. The ideal men and women out there. The quality individuals you want in your daily life will uphold your choice to be sober. Do not fret if you have a few dreadful sober dates with some losers. Just imagine, if you were still consuming alcohol, you might have wound up in an intimate relationship with or even getting married to one of them. Now isn't that a sobering notion?

6. Be the coach.

Many people understand that when they quit drinking, they end up being a little bit of a sober support network for their drinking buddies who are playing with the thought of going alcohol-free.

Never preach your sobriety, but it's always great to be a source of help to sober curious people. The majority of the time, this is just a response to a drunken misadventure and is quickly overlooked by the following weekend. But plenty of individuals wish to live a more disciplined and sober life and need some assistance in advancing in their quest. I know I did.

Whether that's a good friend or an intimate associate, it is essential to discuss these things non-judgemental. Everybody is on their course, and you can not compel anybody to quit drinking. But often, a supporting ear can go a very long way.

Sober Dating, Ready?

Welcome to The Stop Drinking Expert, a platform devoted to helping individuals understand, challenge, and ultimately overcome their relationship with alcohol. With the myriad of health concerns linked to excessive alcohol consumption, it's never been more crucial to evaluate one's drinking habits and take decisive action.

But, navigating the journey to sobriety isn't always easy. This is why we've devoted ourselves to providing resources, guidance, and support to those in need.

When you're on a path of self-improvement and health, you want assurance that the information guiding you is reliable, trustworthy, and grounded in real experiences. That's where we come in.

A Mission Rooted in Genuine Experience

Founded by Craig Beck, a renowned expert in the field, our approach to sobriety is deeply personal. Craig is not just an expert in alcohol addiction; he's lived through the journey of quitting. His best-selling book, Alcohol Lied To Me, offers a candid glimpse into his journey and provides readers with actionable strategies to reclaim their lives from alcohol.

Today, Craig's story has resonated with hundreds of thousands around the world. Through our platform, he has successfully helped over 250,000 people on their journey to sobriety. Our approach isn't based on mere theory but on lived experiences, making our guidance both relatable and effective.

We pride ourselves on offering a compassionate, judgement-free environment. Here, you're not an 'alcoholic'. You're a human being seeking a healthier, more fulfilling life.

Join Our Free Quit Drinking Webinar

To amplify our reach and make our resources more accessible, we're thrilled to offer a free quit drinking webinar every day. This interactive platform provides participants with invaluable insights into the nature of alcohol addiction, effective strategies for quitting, and the tools to maintain long-term sobriety.

Our webinars are a testament to our commitment to accessibility. We believe everyone deserves the tools and knowledge to lead an alcohol-free life, and our webinars bring this information directly to you, wherever you are.

Beyond our webinars, our website is a treasure trove of resources. Whether you're seeking guidance on alcohol rehabilitation or curious about the health implications of drinking, we've got you covered.

Craig Beck: A Trusted Name in Sobriety

Our founder, Craig Beck, is more than an author; he's a beacon of hope for countless individuals worldwide. Over the years, Craig has refined a method that speaks to the heart of alcohol addiction, addressing both its psychological and physiological facets.

When you engage with our platform, you're accessing a well of knowledge backed by expertise, dedication, and, most importantly, personal experience. Craig's approach to sobriety is holistic, ensuring that you're equipped to tackle every challenge that comes your way.

With The Stop Drinking Expert, you're never alone on your journey. Our community of like-minded individuals, led by Craig's insights, ensures you always have a supportive hand to guide you.

Begin Your Journey With Us

Today, as we continue to expand our reach, our mission remains unwavering: to guide as many individuals as possible towards a healthier, happier, alcohol-free life. Whether you're at the start of your sobriety journey or well on your path, we're here to help.

So, why wait? Dive into our resources, join our daily webinar, and let's embark on this transformative journey together. The first step to a brighter, more fulfilling future is just a click away.

We invite you to explore, learn, and, most importantly, believe in the possibility of a life unfettered by alcohol. With The Stop Drinking Expert by your side, anything is possible.

Explore More of Our Resources:

Free Quit Drinking Webinar With The Stop Drinking Expert:

Trying to control alcohol with willpower has a 95% chance of failure. Despite this depressing fact, most people still go down this route.

Reserve your place on our next free coaching session and discover the secret to easy sobriety. 

Reserve My Place

Copyright 2001-2023 Stop Drinking Expert (A trading division of Craig Beck Media Limited)

3811 Ditmars Blvd #1074, Queens, NY 11105, United States

Disclaimer: The website www.stopdrinkingexpert.com is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Users are advised that in certain circumstances quitting drinking 'cold turkey' can be dangerous. This website provides information on how to stop drinking and promotes the author's services and products. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Craig Beck ABNLP. ABHYP. DHyp. ICS is a American board certified therapist and life coach. However, by using this website, you acknowledge and agree that the creator is not liable for any damages or losses arising from your use of this website or any external websites linked to from this website.