Stopping Drinking: 3 Powerful Tips!
I have been getting a lot of emails from people worrying about getting started on their own sober journey. The first week seems insurmountable for a lot of folks, and I think I understand why.
Everyone who arrives at my website or YouTube channel has tried to control or moderate their drinking on their own, many times. Sometimes dozens and hundreds of failed attempts lay in their history with this nasty drug. So, the ego makes a prediction that the future can only lead to more of the same.
There are many reasons why people put off getting started and nearly all of them come from some sort of fear. But remember that f.e.a.r. is just an acronym for false evidence appearing real. It may seem logical that if you have failed to quit drinking multiple times in the past that the likely outcome of yet another attempt is only going to lead to more disappointment.
Willpower does not work!
However, when you stop using willpower and start using a powerful solution like my how to stop drinking course the balance of power changes. Sure, you failed on your own in the past but that’s only because willpower has a 95% chance of failure when it comes to alcoholism and problem drinking. You never really had any real chance of success.
When you get started with me, I show you the truth about this clever and deadly little drug. I strip away the smoke and mirrors and show you the wolf hidden in the sheep’s clothing. Once you understand that alcohol is not your friend, but rather your worst enemy the process of quitting drinking gets so much easier.
The first week is a big one
All that being said, the first week of sobriety can be a little overwhelming for many people, so I wanted to give you three powerful tips to help you get through the first phase of this amazing journey into sobriety.
Tip 1: Stop making predictions about the future.
Human beings love to make predictions, we can’t help ourselves. However, there is a little problem with this commonly shared trait of humanity. We are terrible at it!
Quite often I see people commenting on my YouTube channel with statements like ‘that’s it, enough is enough, I am NEVER drinking again’. When I see that well-intentioned proclamation my heart sinks a little bit. I know that as much as they believe what they are saying, such statements come from the ego and are entirely based on a false assumption that the way they feel at the moment will continue forever.
If you and I went to an all you can eat ice cream parlor and stuffed our faces until we felt sick, and then I made the announcement ‘I am never eating ice cream again’, would you believe me? Do you believe that statement has any depth or weight to it? Of course not, it’s simply a vocalization of how I feel in that moment.
Your sober journey
When you get started on this sober journey avoid making predictions of any sort. Don’t tell everyone you are never drinking again – it just places too much stress and pressure on your shoulders. Think about that, what do us problem drinkers do when we feel stressed and under pressure? That’s right, we drink. So don’t make life more difficult for yourself than it needs to be.
Equally, don’t assume that your sober timeline will match other peoples. Some people get upset because they predicted that they would feel better, or lose weight within a very specific time period. Then when they don’t get the outcome they expected they get angry or frustrated.
My best advice for everyone stopping drinking and doing this powerfully positive thing is to take it moment by moment. Be grateful that at this moment you are sober and free of this evil drug. Stay out of the past and stay out of the future, they’ve got nothing to do with you.
Tip 2: Don’t assume nothing else will change.
The reality is, alcohol has stealthily woven itself into the fabric of your life. You can’t quit drinking alcohol and hope that nothing else will change. Somethings are going to have to change otherwise you are just going to make this more difficult than it really is.
For example, if your traditional Friday night ritual is to finish work and head to the bar to drink beer and play pool with your buddies then it would be foolish to think you can keep doing that in the first phases of the sober journey.
Remember what I said in tip 1.
This doesn’t have to be forever but for the first few weeks, I would advise you to do something dramatically different than what you would normally do. If beers and pool are your Friday night thing then go to the theatre or do something fun with the kids etc. Do anything that is different but do make sure you do something.
If you simply opt out of all the stuff you consider to be fun, you will just find yourself sitting at home bored, lonely and depressed. Again, what do drinkers do when they feel all those negative emotions? You got it! They drink – so make sure you don’t put yourself in that bad place.
Tip 3: Don’t give alcohol more power than it deserves.
We put alcohol on a pedestal and get fearful of it for many reasons. Big alcohol constantly spins the story that quitting drinking is difficult, uncomfortable and even dangerous. Plus this is backed up with lots of personally experienced evidence that states the same. So, we get scared that it is too powerful for us to defeat.
We worry that we are destined to fail.
The truth is, dumping alcohol out of your life is no different from any other big change you could make in your life. When I got married again I fell into a really lazy, comfortable and easy routine. My wife would cook amazing meals and we would spend evenings cuddled up on the sofa watching TV together. This was awesome but as always, there is a heavy price to pay.
One day I looked at myself in the mirror and thought ‘wow I need to head back to the gym and get back in shape’. I had not been to the gym in nearly a year and the first day back was hell on earth, I hated every second of it. The second day sucked even worse than the first and don’t get me started on how the third day felt.
Hate, hate, hate
The truth is I hated, hated, hated the gym for about six weeks – then one day I woke up and I noticed that I was actually looking forward to going.
This is the same for anything else we adopt in our life. Whether you are committing to a healthy routine, going vegan or quitting drinking. Understand and expect that there are going to be moments where you hate your decision, you will regret ever starting and bitch and moan about it. However, just like my experience at the gym, if you just keep going and refuse to give up, you will reach the point where you fall in love with the new version of you.
Are you ready?
If you are ready to get started on stopping drinking with my help? Click here to find out more about my stop drinking online course or click here to book a ticket to my next Quit Drinking Bootcamp.